Agape Love: The Next Step in Spiritual Progression (John 14)

It was June 1st, 1999. I remember the air in the room felt heavy and still, that kind of quiet that usually precedes a storm. When the phone rang, I didn't think much of it, but the voice on the other end changed the trajectory of my life forever. It was a stranger. He didn't offer a greeting or small talk. He just gave it to me straight: "Your dad has four and a half months to live. He has a brain tumor."

That news hit me like a literal baseball bat to the stomach. Have you ever felt that? That sudden, staggering blow that leaves you breathless and reeling? I was living far away at the time, built into a rhythm of life that felt permanent. But in that second, none of it mattered. I dropped everything. My comfort, my schedule, my way of life—it all went out the window. I headed home to take care of my dad because I loved him. There was no internal debate. Love made the decision before my mind could even process the logistics.

But here is the pain point many of us face in our walk with God: we say we "love" Jesus, yet our lives don't reflect that same "drop everything" urgency. We get stuck. We might have the "fear of the Lord" down, and we certainly claim to "believe," but we are stalling out before we reach the transformative power of agape love. We treat our relationship with the Creator like a casual acquaintance rather than the consuming fire it’s meant to be.

If you’ve been feeling like your spiritual life is a series of empty rituals—if you’re tired of "lip service" and desperate for "Lord service"—then you are in the right place. Today, we are going to look at how agape love is the critical third step in our spiritual progression. We’re moving from the fear of the Lord to believing, and now, we are going to park our car on what it truly means to love the Biblical Jesus. By the end of this, my prayer is that your spiritual eyes will be opened to a relationship so intimate that Jesus actually manifests Himself to you.

When I was taking care of my dad during those final months, I learned something about love that no textbook could teach. Love isn't a feeling that gives you "butterflies" in your stomach; it’s an action that puts someone else's needs above your own skin. I was fasting, I was praying, and I was pulling out all the stops. I had my encounter with Jesus back in 1995, so I was still in that "romantic period" of the faith where you see miracles everywhere and expect God to say "yes" to every fervent plea.

But even though I loved my dad with everything I had, he died exactly four and a half months to the day after that phone call. October 15th. I was devastated. I went through seasons of deep depression and crippling panic attacks. It was a pivotal, breaking point. And it was in that brokenness that Jesus began to teach me about the spiritual progression He expects from His disciples.

The Divine Tuning Fork

You know that feeling when you're reading the Bible—maybe a verse you've seen ten thousand times—and suddenly, it clicks? It’s like a tuning fork goes off in your spirit. That is the Spirit of Truth guiding you into truth. Jesus said we could bring out treasures "old and new" from the storehouse, and this progression is one of those ancient treasures.

We start with the fear of the Lord, which is the beginning of wisdom. Then we move to believing—the road to salvation. But then comes the big one: Loving. Jesus defines love very differently than the world does. In our culture, love is often just "puppy love" or "eros"—the erotic, emotional stuff. But the Bible uses the word agape. This is a love of the will, a love of choice, and most importantly, a love of obedience.

Look at what Jesus says in the Gospel of John: He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him (John 14:21 KJV).

Did you catch that? The manifestation of Jesus isn't promised to the person who just "believes" intellectually. It is promised to the one who loves Him. And how do we know if we love Him? We keep His commandments. It’s not about a magic prayer we said once at a summer camp; it’s about a changed life.

The Heart, the Pneuma, and the Pump

I want you to think about the physical heart for a moment. It’s a pump. It drives the blood, and the Bible tells us the life is in the blood. That heart gets the oxygen—the breath of God—to every single cell in your body. In the Greek, "breath" or "spirit" is pneuma.

When we breathe in that spiritual rhema word—the fresh manna that proceeds out of the mouth of God—our heart is supposed to pump that life to our entire being. But we have to watch what we put in our hearts. Jeremiah told us the heart is deceitful and desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9 KJV). So how do we fix a wicked heart? We purify our souls through faith and the "metanoeo"—the changing of the mind.

When we change our minds (repentance), our internal monologue changes. We stop murmuring to ourselves and start meditating on the words of Jesus. We keep His words as "frontlets between our eyes." This is what it means to love the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. It’s a total-body experience.

Abraham: A Blueprint for Faith and Love

We can see this progression clearly in the life of Abraham, the father of our faith. God told him to get out of his house and leave his kindred behind. But what did Abraham do? He brought Lot with him. He was still operating in his own strength, his own "believing" but not fully "loving" through total obedience.

He went through a journey. He lied about Sarah being his sister twice to save his own skin. He even tried to make God's will happen through Hagar, resulting in Ishmael. There was a thirteen-year silence where it seemed he didn't hear from God at all.

But then, the progression reached its peak. Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw something in the spirit. When Isaac asked, "Where is the lamb for a burnt offering?" Abraham answered, My son, God will provide himself a lamb for a burnt offering (Genesis 22:8 KJV). He moved from trying to save his own life to being willing to sacrifice his most beloved treasure because he loved God more.

Jesus echoes this stark reality: He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me (Matthew 10:37 KJV). This sounds harsh to our human ears. I loved my dad. I dropped everything for him. But Jesus was showing me that my love for Him had to be so much greater that my love for my father would look like "hate" by comparison.

Personal Reflections

I’ll be honest with you—this was a hard lesson to swallow. After my dad died, I was a mess. The panic attacks were so intense I felt like my chest was being crushed. I couldn't understand why God didn't answer my fasts or my prayers the way I wanted. I was focusing so much on the earthly loss that I was losing sight of the spiritual destination.

Jesus had to correct me. He showed me that I was parking my car on my emotions instead of His commandments. I was like the people in the "Matthew 7:21-23 crowd." You know the ones. They say, "Lord, Lord," and they even do "wonderful works" and cast out demons. But Jesus says to them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity (Matthew 7:23 KJV).

That word "knew" is about intimacy. It’s about relationship. You can use the name of Jesus as an incantation—I’ve seen people in my night terror groups do it—and the demons might flee for a season because of the authority in the Name. But that doesn't mean the person using the Name knows the Man behind the Name.

I realized I needed to move into the "loving" stage. Love is verifiable fruit. It’s not just calling Him "Lord" with my lips; it's doing what He says. When I started focusing on keeping His words—hiding them in my heart so I wouldn't sin against Him—that's when the healing began. That's when the depression started to lift.

I had to learn that God's perspective on love is different. We think love is about keeping our loved ones alive and comfortable forever. But look at Job. God allowed Job’s children to be taken, and then gave him twice as many later. To our human minds, we think, "But they aren't the same kids! I want the first ones back!" But God is looking at the eternal picture. He defines love; we don't.

If you want to read more about my personal encounters with the supernatural—both the dark stuff I dealt with as a kid and the amazing things God has done since—check out my book OPEN YOUR EYES: MY SUPERNATURAL JOURNEY. I go deep into what it means to be truly "born again" so you can actually see the Kingdom of Heaven. It’s not just a religious term; it’s a spiritual reality that stretches your mind.

Biblical References

The progression from belief to agape is woven throughout the New Testament if you have the eyes to see it. In 1 John, we see this exact sequence:

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous (1 John 5:3 KJV).

Notice that obedience isn't a "burden" if you love Him. If you love someone, doing what they ask is a joy. If you find the commands of Jesus "grievous," you might need to check your love meter. Are you still just in the "believing" phase?

Furthermore, 1 John 5:4-5 tells us: For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. Who is he that overcometh the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the Son of God?

Here we see the full ladder:

1. Believing that Jesus is the Son of God.
2. Being Born of God (the spiritual rebirth).
3. Loving God by keeping His commandments.
4. Overcoming the world.

This is the path. You can't skip steps. You can't be an "overcomer" if you aren't walking in "agape." And you can't walk in "agape" if you haven't moved past a mere intellectual belief.

Peter also gives us a vital piece of the puzzle: And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8 KJV). "Charity" here is agape. Think about that. Love is willing to risk its reputation and its comfort to cover the sin of another. It’s an action verb. It feeds the hungry, it clothes the naked, and it gives a jacket to the one who is shivering. It doesn't just say, "Be warm and filled." It does the work.

Key Takeaways

• Love is Obedience: In the mind of Jesus, you cannot say you love Him if you are not keeping His commandments.
• Manifestation follows Agape: Intimacy and the spiritual manifestation of Jesus are reserved for those who move into the "loving" stage of progression.
• Agape is an Action Verb: True love produces verifiable fruit—feeding, clothing, and serving others in the name of Jesus.
• Priority of Affection: Our love for Jesus must be so paramount that every other earthly relationship looks like "hate" by comparison.
• Repentance is a Mind Shift: To love God with all your "mind" requires a total change in your internal monologue and what you choose to dwell on.

Conclusion and Call to Action

My friends, we are on a journey. If you started in Dallas and you’re heading for Tacoma, you’re going to see the scenery change. You’re going to feel the weather get colder. Your spiritual life should be the same. You shouldn't be the same person you were when you first "believed."

Are there signs of a believer in your life? Are you casting out demons? Are you speaking with new tongues? But even more importantly—are there signs of a lover of God in your life? Do you have a pure heart and clean hands? Is the Spirit of Truth highlighting the Word to you like a tuning fork?

I am so grateful you decided to have "coffee" with me today. My passion is for you to have a real, spiritual relationship with the Biblical Jesus. Not the "cultural" Jesus, not the "incantation" Jesus, but the one who wants to make His abode with you.

If this message touched you, please share it with your friends and family

Until we meet again, let’s dig deeper and go higher. Team Jesus!

Action Items

• Audit Your Internal Monologue: Spend ten minutes today observing your thoughts. Are they stayed on Him, or are you "murmuring" in a deceitful heart?
• Learn the Sermon on the Mount: Start with just a few verses. Hiding His words in your heart is the first step to keeping His commandments.
• Perform a "Love Audit": Look at your actions over the past week. Where did you "drop everything" for the sake of Jesus or His people? If the answer is "nowhere," ask the Holy Spirit to give you an opportunity to serve.
• Read John 14-15: Read these chapters slowly, asking the Spirit of Truth to act as a tuning fork and highlight exactly what "keeping His commandments" looks like for you today.
• Identify Your "Lot": Is there something or someone you are carrying along your journey that God told you to leave behind? Be willing to sacrifice it to reach the next level of progression.