Have you ever felt like you were just one step away from the edge? Not just a metaphorical edge, but the kind of abyss where the silence is so heavy it feels like it might actually crush the life out of you? Maybe you're carrying a secret pain, a trauma from your childhood, or a mistake from your past that you're certain disqualifies you from ever being used by God. You look at the "perfect" people in the pews and think, "If they only knew what I've done—or what's been done to me—they'd walk the other way."
That weight of shame is a muzzle. It's a spiritual gag that the enemy uses to keep you from the very thing that could set someone else free: your testimony. We live in a world that is aching and screaming for reality, yet we often hide behind religious masks because we're afraid that our "mess" is too big for the "message." We feel empty, rejected, and alone, wondering if the supernatural power of Jesus is something that only happened in the Book of Acts or if it's still available for the person at rock bottom today.
I'm here to tell you that Jesus is the Rock at the bottom. In this post, I want to share the incredible story of my brother, Pastor AT, from San Antonio. His journey from being pushed off a three-story building to the drug-fueled streets of Hollywood, and finally to a radical revival in the heart of Texas, is a testament to the fact that God doesn't just want to save you—He wants to use your deepest scars as the blueprint for your greatest ministry. If you’ve been waiting for a reason to break your silence, this is it.
The Fall That Should Have Been Final
Imagine for a moment being five years old, standing on the edge of a three-story building. The air is hot, the sounds of the city are humming below, and suddenly, the world tilts. There's no warning. Just a shove from a bully, a moment of weightless terror, and then the rush of the wind as the ground comes up to meet you.
Pastor AT lived this. He was a young boy, an immigrant from El Salvador whose family had fled the horrific violence of a civil war where people were being hunted and executed. He came to America not speaking a word of English, already carrying the weight of a displaced life, only to be met with the cruelty of a bully. When he was pushed off that building, he landed head-first on the concrete. By every medical and physical law, he should have died right there. His skull should have shattered; his neck should have snapped.
But God had a different plan.
AT remembers the peace. Even in the middle of that plunge, the peace of the Lord was there. His mother, a woman of deep, desperate prayer, did something most of us find impossible. She told the Lord, “If it is Your will, please allow my son to live; but if it is not, then take him with You.” She surrendered him completely. When AT woke up in the hospital, the doctors were baffled. They ran MRIs, CT scans, and every test imaginable. The result? Not a single scratch. Not a broken bone. Not even a bruise. He was back in school the very next day.
This is the prophetic nature of God’s protection. As it says in the Word: For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone (Psalm 91:11-12 KJV). AT didn't just dash his foot; he landed on his head from thirty feet up, yet the hand of God was the invisible cushion that preserved a future evangelist.
The Mansion and the Mirror
Fast forward years later. That miracle hadn't yet translated into a relationship with Jesus. Instead, the trauma of bullying and the feeling of rejection led AT into a life of violence and drugs. He joined the Marine Corps in 1998, thinking that serving his country or becoming "somebody" would fill the void. But the void only grew. By the time he ended up in West Hollywood, he was living what looked like the "dream" to the world—staying in a mansion near the House of Blues, partying all day and night.
But inside, he was a "wretch," as he calls himself. The enemy was whispering the same old lies: “You’re worthless. You’re useless. This is it.” I remember a similar time in my own life back in 1995. I was at my own rock bottom when Jesus showed up. For AT, it happened with a gun in his hand. He was standing in that mansion, contemplating two ways to end it: a bullet to the head or a jump from the highest building in Los Angeles. It's ironic, isn't it? The man who had been terrified of heights ever since he was pushed off that building as a child was now being lured by the devil to jump again. The enemy always tries to repeat the trauma.
Right at that moment, the phone rang. It was a family member who had recently given her life to Christ. She didn't know he had a gun. She just knew she had to call. She told him, “Just give God one chance. Raise your hands and call upon His name.”
In that room, surrounded by the remnants of a wasted life, AT raised his hands. For the first time, he didn't just hear about God; he experienced the peace that surpasses all understanding. He felt Jesus inside of him. That encounter changed everything.
Taking it to the Streets
Now, Pastor AT doesn't just sit in a church building. He’s the face of "Jesus Lives In My City" in San Antonio. He takes the gospel to the darkest places—the places where people are afraid of being shot. Why? Because he used to be the one people were afraid of. He realizes that if he had no fear of men when he was serving the darkness, he should have even less fear now that he serves the Light.
He told me about a recent encounter with a man named Scottie. AT was downtown and saw this guy skateboarding without a shirt on, looking high and frustrated. Most people would have walked past. But AT saw the skateboard—something he used to be a professional at—and used it as a "point of contact."
He asked to borrow the board. He started talking to Scottie, who was actually on his way to buy more crystal meth. Scottie was angry at God because his grandmother had passed away. He was hurting. But AT didn't give him a theological lecture; he gave him a testimony. He loved on him.
Right there on the sidewalk, Scottie began to cry. He repented of his sins and confessed Jesus as Lord. He went from looking for "ice" (meth) to finding the Living Water. AT didn't just leave him there, either. He gave him his number and offered him a ride to church. That is true discipleship. It’s the "Acts 29" life we are called to live.
Personal Reflections
Watching AT’s ministry over the years has been a huge encouragement to me and my wife, Susan. Sometimes, in ministry, you can get caught up in the "how-to" and forget the "Who." We see people posting on social media for self-glory, but then you see someone like AT who uses technology to shine a light on what Jesus is doing in the streets.
It reminds me that our testimony is a weapon. In my own journey, especially when dealing with the spiritual attacks I describe in Overcoming Night Terror: Making the Demons Leave, I realized that the enemy is most afraid of the person who isn't ashamed of their past.
I’ve learned that Jesus meets us at our rock bottom. He doesn't wait for us to climb out of the hole; He jumps into the hole with us. I’ve missed it sometimes—I've been the one walking into Walmart, praying for an opportunity, and then almost missing the person limping right in front of me because I was too busy looking for a "burning bush." But Jesus is always correcting me, reminding me that the "burning bush" is often just a person in need of a kind word or a prayer.
As AT says, "Break the Silence." There are people in your city right now who are contemplating suicide, just like he was. There are people who have been molested, raped, or bullied, and they are waiting for someone to be brave enough to say, "I’ve been through the fire, too, and Jesus brought me out."
Biblical References
The foundation of everything AT does is found in the Word. We often think we need a degree in apologetics to reach the lost, but the Bible shows us a different way. Look at the woman at the well or the man at the Gadarenes. They didn't go to seminary; they went and told people what Jesus had done for them.
And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death (Revelation 12:11 KJV).
This is the spiritual reality of our warfare. Your testimony isn't just a story; it's an overcoming power. When you speak the truth of what God has done, you are applying the blood of the Lamb to the situation.
AT also lives out the reality of being a "city on a hill." His ministry's name comes right from the teachings of Jesus:
Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven (Matthew 5:14-16 KJV).
And finally, the heart of the "Break the Silence" movement is found in the mandate of the Messiah:
The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised (Luke 4:18 KJV).
Key Takeaways
- Your trauma is not your identity. God can preserve you through the unthinkable for a purpose you can't yet see.
- Testimony over Theory. You don't need a PhD to share Jesus. You just need to tell people what He has done for you.
- Discipleship is a 24/7 Lifestyle. It’s not about "events"; it's about the person God puts in your path while you're at the store or on the street.
- Break the Silence. Bringing your pain into the light of God's presence is the first step to being able to help others heal.
- Unity Impacts Cities. When ministries come together for the sake of the lost, the atmosphere of a city changes.
Conclusion and Call to Action
Pastor AT's life proves that no matter how far you've fallen—whether it’s three stories off a building or into the depths of a drug addiction—Jesus is there to catch you. But He doesn't just catch you to keep you safe; He catches you to send you back out as a warrior.
Are you hiding your light under a bushel? Are you letting the enemy keep you silent about the miracles God has worked in your life? It’s time to dig deeper and go higher. It’s time to recognize that you are the light of your city.
If this story touched you, I want to encourage you to head over to ConradRocks.net and check out more testimonies of how Jesus is transforming lives. We are all part of "Team Jesus," and your voice is a vital part of the choir.
Would you like to join the conversation? Leave a comment below or share this post with someone who needs to know that their life has a purpose. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to the podcast and follow our journey as we continue to spotlight what God is doing across the nation.
Action Items
- Identify Your "Skateboard": Think of one hobby, interest, or past experience (like AT’s skateboarding) that you can use as a bridge to talk to someone about Jesus this week.
- Write Out Your 2-Minute Testimony: Distill your "before," "meeting Jesus," and "after" into a short narrative so you’re ready when the Holy Spirit provides an opening.
- Pray for a "Scottie": Ask the Lord to place someone in your path today who is at their breaking point, and commit to not walking past them.
- Connect with a Local Ministry: Find an outreach in your area—like a food pantry or street ministry—and offer to help, even if it’s just for one afternoon.
- Read One Chapter of Acts: Immerse yourself in the "normal" Christian life of the early church to build your faith for the supernatural.
Until we meet again, dig deeper and go higher!
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